Friday, 1 November 2013

I can see clearly now

This refers not to the title of Johnny Nash's 1972 hit, but to the fact that I now have new glasses. The old ones had lenses that were four years old, and as both eyes had become a little more long-sighted, it was getting hard to read small print. Now I can, with ease!

I picked them up yesterday morning. Not only do they fix my eyesight, they are very comfortable to wear. Well done, Specsavers! They are rounder than the previous specs, and have a little decoration on the nose bridge and the side arms near the hinge. It isn't much, but I think it softens the utilitarian look that the old frames had, and - to my way of thinking, anyway - these new frames seem to be a little more flattering to my face overall. You may agree or you may not; but unless I fork out more cash, I am stuck with them for a couple of years, and must make the best of it. I suppose it must be like selecting an expensive new wig, which, for better or worse, you have to live with for a long time ahead. You simply must learn to love it, and regard it as a great improvement in your presentation!

To remind you of what the previous specs looked like, here are shots of me standing in the middle of a street at Stamford, and seated in Fiona at Burghley House, both pix taken within the last week:

And here is an unashamedly ├╝ber-narcissistic gallery of shots at home, in my lounge and study, with the new specs on:

Every mood captured! In a variety of lighting conditions too, as the sun came and went, and I moved from room to room. And here I am wearing the FCUK 'designer' frames I bought in May 2009, which I abandoned in February 2010 because I was convinced they didn't suit me:

They were sort of half-trendy, but I think I was dead right to switch to the oval frames seen in the top two shots. I think these designer frames are way too severe. And, to be honest, uncomfortable. You can easily see I don't like wearing them. Unfortunately the photos I took for my current passport and driving licence, both dating from January 2010, show me with these awful glasses on.

The new frames aren't all that much different from the old, and I am very sure that I'll soon be taking them for granted.

They don't seem to have detracted from my femininity. After leaving Specsavers, I toddled along to The Lanes and into the Sussex Arms for a coffee and a bowl of chips for lunch. While at the pub, I went to the loo, and got into conversation in there with another lady about the insane way the cubicle doors opened inwards, so that to get out, you had to retreat back against the loo seat, or even straddle it with your legs. We agreed that large ladies (meaning fat ladies - and she assured me I wasn't fat, bless her) would be seriously challenged by the lack of floor space. In fact they would hardly be able to get in or out. She said to me, with her eyes flashing, designed by a man. I agreed with her absolutely. We were united. Men just don't understand the needs of female persons.

I could add that men don't understand that every female cubicle needs hooks to hang bags and coats on, to keep them off the floor. And they don't understand where the toilet tissue dispenser needs to be, so that while still seated - before one gets up off the loo seat, and begins to drip pee onto it - a woman can grab a pad of tissues to dab herself with. Men can be so smug and arrogant, thinking they know it all. But they don't.

1 comment:

  1. Blokes know very little and sadly never have to use most of the things they are allowed to design. No bloke has ever washed a kitchen item in their lives or they would actually BE washable... Blokes are a menace.

    Like new specs.


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