Monday, 14 January 2013

Slave to convention

Recently I've changed the wording in my Blog Profile. The new Profile supersedes the one that I used from early 2011, and right through 2012.

The old one was distinctly celebratory. Nothing wrong with that. But nowadays life has settled down for the long haul, and the emphasis is on life's long-term continuity from childhood to the grave. It can all be examined, and I think must be, shifting it for clues as to how such and such a thing came to be.

But not to excess: with so few years left now, one's eyes need to be fixed on the future more than anything else. Besides, for me, this latest phase is rather exciting. I am for the first time in my life free to do as I please, as the person I want to be. It's the phase offering the best opportunities yet for personal development, ambition-achieving, and enjoying long-term contentment. There are trade-offs and compromises galore: how can you escape them? But nothing that irks me, except lack of ready cash.

So it has come as a shock to realise how thoroughly conventional my present life is. Not at all the life of a freewheeler! See if you agree. Here are some lists to illustrate what I mean:

Things I have, or do, that are completely conventional
A house, with the usual appliances.
A car.
A radio.
A PC, laptop and tablet.
A mobile phone.
A camera.
A liking for good company once or twice during the week.
A pension.
A savings account (albeit not a fat one now).
A credit card.
A debit card.
A household shopping list on the go.
Enough pride in my house to pay for a cleaning lady, so that it always looks nice.
Enough interest in the garden to pay for a mower man, so that the lawns look great.
An active interest in writing, reading, photography, driving, sightseeing, eating out, eating in, keeping reasonably fit, clothes, current affairs, history, science, music, paintings and cultural things generally.
A preference to be law-abiding; but wary of authority, a bit untrusting of shops and services and financial institutions, and not at all attracted to politics.
Quick with my opinion, but no activist.

Things mildly out of the ordinary, but still conventional by most standards
Owning a lot of books.
Collecting old maps.
No daily paper.
No satellite TV.
Watching only the BBC news, weather, and some documentaries on the TV.
Listening only to BBC Radio 4 on the radio.
Not a great watcher of films.

Things very much out of the ordinary (...or are they?)
No sex (intimacy hangups, too old and unattractive).
No longing for a relationship (all doomed to failure; and anyway now too old to cope with yet another).
Defensive of my personal space and time (putting freedom and independence above the pleasures of commitment).

These pretty well cover my life as it is at the moment, and I think my point is amply made. I am a slave to convention in almost everything! If there is any virtue in that, then I duly claim it. But I wish my lists showed something spectacularly unusual, something really worthy of remark. Instead I'm just humdrum. Sigh.

1 comment:

  1. That's life Lucy! All we can do is live it. Possessions mean nothing, they are just things that may make life more bearable but only if they are actually used! The most important things are your health, well-being and happiness. Make the most of it whilst you are still able.

    Shirley Anne x


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