Much against the concerns of my friends, I drove home in Fiona at 2.30am. I was tired, had had enough for one night, and was longing for home. I had great offers of a bed but I wanted my own. I'd mostly drunk water for hours past, and with luck I would avoid any police checks and get home in one piece. Actually it was pretty quiet as I walked quickly along the seafront to my car, just one or two men about, and it was raining steadily. Happy New Year.
Reaching Fiona, I locked myself in, did what I could with my wet hair, then drove the long way home via Lewes, encountering only fog and lots of water in the road. But Fiona, my clever and capable travelling capsule, shrugged all that off and I got back safely at 3.00am, oddly awake again. I thought of watching a bit more of the two DVD films I'd started - one of them Avatar, and maybe a post on that soon - but common sense prevailed and I went to bed, and with only one break slept through to 11.00am. It was still spitting with rain.
The six of us had a fun time last night, but I wasn't quite attuned to the celebrations. I kept on retreating into a detached state, a quiet shell, and gradually I felt that I needed to be on my own. Of course, if it was noticed, I denied it, because naturally I didn't want to spoil the event in any way. I think mine must be a very strange reaction to all the lively New Year celebrations: most people living on their own would surely yearn for love and the company of someone very special. Oh well. I do know - harking back to the subject of the last post - that I wasn't in the mood for receiving personal attention, and would have politely repelled anything coming my way. Fortunately nothing did.
For certain, I'm no party animal - and no good time girl either! But what am I, because I'm definitely no pillar of rectitude. I'm inclined to ignore the rules if it suits me. At all times, I like to do my own thing and go my own way, but that's not necessarily what many would regard as the proper or correct thing to do. Perhaps I'll slowly discover more things about my true nature during the coming year, and learn to accommodate others better. Maybe even make a few compromises. (No, I can't really see that happening either! But who knows)
Meanwhile, a Happy New Year to everyone. May your plans succeeed, and your dearest wishes come true!