Sunday, 2 January 2011

TS Girlfriend

A while back I found this website: http://www.tsgirlfriend.com/, and I've been having another look at it. Some of you may know about it. In a series of articles - scroll down to the bottom of the home page to view them all - it offers advice to men who wish to date a transsexual girl, whatever her age. It's not telling a TS girl how to date. It's telling her prospective boyfriend all about her, what she wants, how she may react, and how to make her feel good. There are a few articles for the TS girl herself, including one about coming out to an interested man, and the possible consequences of leaving it too late. It's all written by TS women. One or two articles pull no punches: for example, exactly how to have sex with a TS girl, including how to deal with personal hangups, and her own possible inexperience at, for instance, giving a blow job. (Phew. Is this really what's in store?)

I thought it was highly thought-provoking to see things from the man's point of view. Because whether you want a man or not, you have to deal with them, and until you say 'absolutely not' to any advances they might make, they will regard you as a possibility for love and companionship. You need to know what may be going on in a man's mind. And you need to know what you may find yourself doing when a man engages your attention.

I'm hardly well-qualified to say much. I'm a typical low-libido, unsexy, happiest-with-women sort of girl. But I recognise that one day, regardless of my own plans and inclinations, some man will want to chat me up, and suggest a meal out, and who knows what else, and anything that may help me cope seems like required information in my book. As the author of this website says at one point, the average TS girl is not a mature judge of men: she's gone back to her teens where relationship matters are concerned, needs tender handling, and may be emotionally naive. That'll be me, and maybe you too.

5 comments:

  1. Just no.
    An awful website.
    Ok, I get the premise. But if you peruse the website further, it's no better than tvc***x or similar.
    Garbage.
    Imagine similar for how to 'date" disabled or those with a coloured skin?
    No-one is 'naiive' enough.

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  2. Well, I'm not going to defend the site for good taste, style or language used. But it seemed to have useful messages. I was much interested in the site's approach, and I did think the emphasis was on getting the TS girl treated with proper consideration and respect. And it has made me think seriously about the kind of situations that one might get into, deliberately or not.

    Dating sites are easy to knock. On the whole I'd avoid them too, but not everyone has the opportunity to explore nicer alternatives.

    Lucy

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  3. I've seen that site. Well-intentioned, I think, but I would stay away too. For one thing, if I am ever with a guy, there will be no confessions, no revelations. Anyone who dates me won't be dating a "TS girl."

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  4. Hi Lucy, on the basis (or perhaps in the spirit) of what you were offering in your post I think this website has enough information in it that you can just filter out the 'unappropriate' and discover new things in the more 'appropriate' links. I found some interesting and in some cases helpful information. And one thing I am always open to is try new things which given the do's and don'ts of the pre-op blow job was amusing and helpful because I had not previously appreciated some of those things. Any new site I will always pay a visit and seek to sift the gold dust from the course sand.

    Thanks Lucy, I now have a checklist of things to take on a hot date from now on. ;)
    Hugs Helen xx

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  5. I agree Lucy, it's interesting, thought provoking stuff.

    Another thing is how such a topic brings out strong reactions from varying trans women. Take Ariel's view for example that "No man I date will know I'm TS" or words to that effect.

    That's all very well but it's hard work for any individual to hide their history no matter what that history is. In order for a woman to hide her trans history she would have to either eliminate anyone from her life that could reveal her secret or have people such as her family and old friends agree not to tell AND couple that with not sharing with her man (or woman for that matter) any details for her earlier life including photos of herself as a child.

    It's not something I could do.

    As it happens my own past is an open book and I don't ask or expect my friends to keep it a secret. Sure I don't go out and introduce myself as a trans woman but I accept that that is a part of who I am and simply hope that people don't just see me as that and nothing else.

    Thank you Lucy for being brave enough not to shy away from interesting discussion topics.

    ReplyDelete

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Lucy Melford