Tuesday, 26 May 2009

Now Dad has died

It's 1am. The police have just come to my door and broken the news that Dad has died of a heart attack at home. The police said he tried to phone for an ambulance, but they found him dead. He's been removed to the local undertaker's, and the coroner will phone me in the morning. That's Mum, Dad and my only brother all gone. No immediate family left at all.

I'm on my own here. I've spoken to my partner, who was wonderful, but it's too late at night to contact anybody else. There's nothing I can do just now except cry.

I last saw Dad three days ago. We had lunch. He was all right then. I was going to phone him earlier this evening. I forgot. We'll never speak again.

Why a heart attack? What brought it on? Was it grief at Mum's death only three months back? Worry over my transition? Or just old age? He was 88.

Isn't it a bit bloody sad that the only thing I can do is post this. But I have to do something.

I don't think I can write anything else.

5 comments:

  1. Lucy, I am so sorry and my heart goes out to you. I remember that terrible feeling on hearing such news. Your in my thoughts.xx

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  2. Thanks so much, Lucy, it's a comfort. I'm all right, really I am, but I can't sleep. There'll be so much to see to in the morning. I know exactly what to do - it'll be a ghastly replay in almost every respect of Mum's death in February and its aftermath. And another funeral. Same place, same people - well, one less. Oh God. I wonder why the coroner is involved...will it mean an inquest? Oh well, it'll all have to be faced. Lucy M

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  3. All sudden deaths are automatically referred to the coroner, very very few make it to a hearing, I believe. Hope that puts your mind at rest.
    Hope you managed to get some sleep. Wish well x

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  4. Lucy...

    My heart goes out to you at this sad time, even though we have never met.

    Take time to grieve, but please try not to brood.

    My father died in Worthing hospital four years ago. After a 300 mile drive, I was too late to be there.

    That's the way things happen sometimes, so lay that guilt aside, pet...

    Praying for you,

    chrissie
    xxxx

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  5. Lucy...I'm an occasional visitor...not written before. I'm so sorry to read this. I lost my Mum 17 months ago, suddenly, leaving me a grown up orphan in transition too...

    It's so hard. I'm thinking of you.

    You'll get through hon...let out what you have to let out.

    Hugs

    Jo xx

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This blog is public, and I expect comments from many sources and points of view. They will be welcome if sincere, well-expressed and add something worthwhile to the post. If not, they face removal.

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Lucy Melford