It's 1am. The police have just come to my door and broken the news that Dad has died of a heart attack at home. The police said he tried to phone for an ambulance, but they found him dead. He's been removed to the local undertaker's, and the coroner will phone me in the morning. That's Mum, Dad and my only brother all gone. No immediate family left at all.
I'm on my own here. I've spoken to my partner, who was wonderful, but it's too late at night to contact anybody else. There's nothing I can do just now except cry.
I last saw Dad three days ago. We had lunch. He was all right then. I was going to phone him earlier this evening. I forgot. We'll never speak again.
Why a heart attack? What brought it on? Was it grief at Mum's death only three months back? Worry over my transition? Or just old age? He was 88.
Isn't it a bit bloody sad that the only thing I can do is post this. But I have to do something.
I don't think I can write anything else.